He's Here! (A Natural Birth Story)

I was 40 weeks and 5 days, and had just written this post.  I was feeling tired, emotional, and just so ready for baby to come.

On the way to pick Little Guy up from school, the receptionist from our birth center called so that I could set up some testing at the hospital on Friday (41+1) to make sure baby was doing ok. 

Little Guy had received some Halloween cards in the mail, and we opened and read them together when we got home. 

I went to use the bathroom, and as soon as I headed back to the living room, I thought, "Uh, oh! I'm peeing my pants!"  

I couldn't have been though, because I just went!

That's when it dawned on me that my water had broken.  

Little Guy and I were both so excited to know that the baby would be coming within the next day!

I'm so, so glad that my water broke while he was with me.  We had decided that he wouldn't accompany us to the birth center, but I really wanted him to feel a part of the experience.  The excitement on his face was priceless, and he felt so special to be the first one to know that the baby was coming.

I called Hubby at work and told him to come home, and then called the birth center.  They asked us to come in so that they could make sure it was amniotic fluid.  I knew it would be, because it was not stopping! Every time I leaned a certain way, more would leak. 

After Hubby got home, he and I dropped Little Guy off at my parents' house on the way to the birth center and once there, the midwife's assistant confirmed that indeed, my water was broken.

I was really happy because the assistant that was there that day was the first assistant we'd met when we toured the center and fell in love with it. We'd spent so many visits with her, but we hadn't seen her in about a month.
I had such a good giggle as I stood there talking to her and the receptionist about my water breaking, I felt like I was peeing my pants. The assistant confirmed that I was 4-5 cm dilated and sent us to dinner.  She told us to take a walk after dinner and come back at 8 so she could check my progress.  During our dinner/walking time I was instructed to alternate 2 types of homeopathic tablets that you dissolve under your tongue to help get labor going.

Around 7 my contractions finally started and I told Hubby that we better start heading back to the birth center (about 30 minutes away).  On the way to the center, the contractions started to become pretty timetable at 5 minutes apart, lasting for a minute.  The strangest part, was that they weren't just in my abdomen (there were there too, trust me), but they were radiating up my bum!  It was weird and uncomfortable and not at all what I expected.

By the time we reached the birth center, the midwife had arrived, and I felt pretty sure I was in active labor. The midwife checked me and said I was 5-6 cm and we'd be staying.  

Whoo-hoo!  Though I was kind of wishing I'd taken a nap that day... 

I got in the tub, which was nice and relaxing, but in all honesty, didn't in any way lessen the feeling of my contractions.  

It's pretty funny how it works though, I really was completely normal in between contractions.  We were all just hanging out and talking and then when a contraction would come, I'd just go into it mentally, breathe through it, and then bring my awareness right back into the room. At least that was during the first part of active labor.  

After a while, I got out of the tub and onto the birth ball, which felt safe to me, since my contractions seemed to be coming from the front and from below at the same time.  I used the softness of the birth ball to ease the intensity of the feeling from my bum.
The best way I can describe the feeling of my contractions is this:  imagine someone has a daggar pointed at your lower abdomen and there is a sharp spike pointed up your bum - now, at the same time, the dagger is inserted and twisted as you are lowered onto the spike.  That was a contraction for me. 

(I found out that Baby Boy's head was pretty much sitting on my tailbone, and since I had no bag of water to cushion him at all, that could have been why my contractions were feeling that way.)

As I grew nearer to transition, my contractions became much more intense.  I could no longer remain quiet through them and each one was accompanied by a deep moan and the shakes.  

The midwife checked my progress and let us know I was at 8 cm.
The beginning of transition.  

My uncontrollable shaking was becoming stronger, so it was suggested I get back into the warm water.  I did, but still continued to shake.  Where before, I was my normal self between contractions, now, I was completely exhausted between them.  In that brief space I was given before the next one would come, I felt as if I could fall immediately asleep. 

The midwife asked if I felt pressure yet, but it was hard to determine because the intensity of the contractions was so strong, and since I was feeling the contractions in my bum, I had no idea how I'd be able to differentiate between the pressure to push and the pressure from the contractions.

At 1:08 am, the contractions were so severe and I decided I might feel ready to push, so I began to push in the tub.  I found this to be really unproductive, because I really wanted to be able to brace myself against something, so I got out of the tub and used the birthing stool (which is like a little bench with a C shape cut into in and handles on either side).

Hubby stayed behind me to push against my back because I was afraid I'd topple backwards.  

At this point, the contractions became unnoticeable.  I don't know if it's because the urge to push was far stronger, or if the pain from them actually subsided to give me the ability to push.  

Pushing was, for me, the most difficult part of the entire labor.  Not so much because of pain (even though Hubby repeatedly reminded me about the "ring of fire" that was supposed to happen -thanks, babe - it actually wasn't that bad for me), but just the sheer effort it took for me to brace myself and push (and make progress pushing) and breathe, and push again without losing the progress I had made on the previous push.  It came to the point that I was just pushing, and pushing, and not wanting to take any sort of break at all in between.  Even a 2 second break felt like an eternity when I had all this work to do.  Work that had to be done now.  

There was one point when I managed to squeek out an "I can't do this," and as my midwife assured me that I could, I knew that was a mistake.  My energy was far too precious at this point to be wasted on talking, especially self defeating talk.  That was when I knew that I was going to do this, and I was going to use every ounce of my being to do it.

I scooted off the edge of the stool, put my chin to my chest, and pushed with all I had.  Pausing only a millisecond for a quick breath before pushing more.  

Once baby's head emerged, a huge amount of the pressure was gone.  One more set of pushes sent the rest of our 7 pound 15 oz baby boy earth side and into my arms at 1:56 am.  

I was completely overwhelmed.  

At the sight and touch of my sweet baby boy.

At the thought that he and I both worked together in one of the most difficult things I would ever do to bring him into this world.

At the realization that as he cried his first breath of life this little creature that I'd spent so long growing in my womb became a little soul who would travel the world with us.  

I was in love.  

Hubby and I stayed at the birth center until around 6am, when we decided we would all rest better if we headed home.

When Little Guy came home from school, seeing the love he immediately had for his baby brother was absolutely priceless.

I cannot tell you the amazing sense of accomplishment it gave me to know that I birthed my son without intervention or medication.  The experience was so different from Little Guy's birth.  Rather than being told what the Doctor's were making happen, I was experiencing what was just happening naturally through my body. The pain was not horrific or unmanageable.  There was no screaming or crying.  The whole experience was sort of surreal.  Looking back on it, none of it seemed very bad at all. Maybe it's because I knew the pain would not last forever.  The pain was a means to an end, and focusing on that one fact was tremendously helpful.

To tell the truth, this first week of breastfeeding and sleeplessness has been far more difficult than our natural birth experience! ;)

4

Pregnancy: Week 10 and Why We're Using a Birth Center

During week 10, I had my first "official" appointment at the birth center.  It was wonderful!  I can't get over the difference between the birth center that I'm using for this pregnancy and the ob/gyn I used for my previous pregnancy.

while pregnant with Little Guy

Let me start by giving you a little background.  When I was pregnant with Little Guy, I had absolutely no idea what I was doing.  I found a local ob/gyn (a very nice man) who was part of a big practice with multiple locations in the Orlando area.  The appointments usually went like this:

Walk in, sign in, wait to be called back.
Get called back and weighed and told to put on your gown and wait for the doctor.
Wait about 20 minutes in your paper gown alone in the exam room until the doctor and nurse finally come in.
Make about 1 minute of small talk with the doctor, get examined, about 1 more minute of small talk with the doctor, and he leaves.
Get dressed, head back out to the lobby, arrange your payment, schedule next appointment, anddd done.
I doubt they even knew my name without their clipboard.

When it was time to have the baby, I went to Winnie Palmer hospital (which is a newer, beautiful hospital that specializes in women and children), had a very great nurse (for the second half of labor- I don't really remember the nurse I had before shift change), and a woman doctor (who seemed nice enough) whom I'd never met before "caught" Little Guy and stitched me up.

I told the new nurse that came in after delivery, that I wanted to breastfeed (my doctor hadn't talked to me at all about it though, so I knew virtually nothing except for the logistics).  She said, "ok," and left the room.  When she came back in to check on us again and asked how it was going, I told her I was having a little trouble, so she just got a bottle of formula and had me feed it to the baby and told me I could try again when I got home.
Gee, thanks for your help and expertise and caring.  Was there a number I could call?  An organization I could talk to?  Would it have taken you more than 2 minutes to get me a pamphlet or something? That's what bothered me most about my experience.  The lack of care. Not medical care.  Human care. As a person to another person. A soul to another soul.  That's what I was desperately missing from my birth experience.

I did end up trying for about a month, breastfeeding and pumping, but since I knew nothing, I eventually gave up and went to formula full-time.

I am in no way blaming or shaming any of the people above.  It wasn't a horrible experience, and Little Guy was born healthy and fine. And I'm not criticizing anyone who chooses to go the ob/gyn/hospital route with their pregnancy.  I've just chosen to try a new route this time around.

It's one of those situations where, once you've seen, you can never "unsee."  Once you know, you can never "unknow," and I know that birth could be a much different experience.  I have a friend that had natural births in a birth center, and her birth story was so inspiring.  My eyes really opened when I watched the documentary Pregnant In America. I followed that up with Ricki Lake's:  The Business of Being Born and More Business of Being Born.  

Here they are if you'd like to check them out.  


The documentaries basically set out to inform people that pregnancy is not a medical condition.  It's a natural condition.  You do not automatically need a doctor to have a baby.  Women have been having babies since the beginning of time, it's a natural process that our bodies were designed to perform.


Yes, I am fully aware that sometimes complications arise in which a doctor's care is needed, and I am thankful that we have doctors for such circumstances.  I just feel that they don't need to be the automatic go-to for a healthy pregnancy.

So....back to my birth center and how much Hubby and I love it.  He raves about it as soon as we get in the car each time we leave the center.  The ladies there are real women.  They want to know how you're doing.  They share their past experiences with you.  They believe in you, and your power to know and choose what is right for you.

Humanity example:  at this 10 week appointment, we were talking about my nausea, and the midwife gave me a bag of crystallized ginger to take home.  She then proceeded to give me a bag-full of her own blend of loose leaf prenatal tea to try.  As I was leaving, we were talking about increased gas during pregnancy, and she had Hubby and I try these Papaya Enzyme Tablets that I mentioned in my last pregnancy update. My previous ob/gyn never took the time out and care, let alone the expense to give me anything like that during my visits.

Here's the best way I can sum it up:
Going to the doctor when you're pregnant is like going to the doctor when you're pregnant.
Going to a birth center when you're pregnant is like going to your incredibly knowledgeable Aunt's house where all your incredibly knowledgeable cousins happen to be as well.  They know a ton, have lots of experience, and they actually care about you.

We're so glad we've made this decision.

2